Mass and Remembering Friends

I left the house after completing the blog post about last night's dinner at 4.40pm and went to Mass at Holy Ghost Church which is about .3 of a mile from here. Photos of the church can be seen in last Saturday's post.

I was particularly struck by the gospel phrase: "the Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect" Luke 12:40.

The truth of the phrase brought to mind for me the death of two of my former colleagues who were also close friends during the last twelve months - Dr. Heather Skinner and Dr. Kathryn Ringwald-Wildman. 

Both will be greatly missed in many ways, but especially I pray for them at this time as they come to mind for all the comments they have made on holiday blog posts over the years. Indeed, Heather had been commenting since the first blog - see the links to the right - in 2006. Kath only became active in some of the USA and Canda blogs and especially in 2018 trip when her experience from 20 years earlier when she had visited with her first husband, helped informed a lot of what we did and saw.

As I sit in prayer I reflect that I have been very lucky to have four women who have been a huge influence on me during my time in Higher Education. All of them inspired me, led me in new directions and challenged me to do even more. The four are Sue Cole, Dr. Norah Jones and the two people I remember especially tonight, Dr. Heather Skinner and Dr. Kath Ringwald. Each helped me in different ways and I give thanks for them all, those thankfully still with us, and those we miss especially at this time.

Sue Cole, my tutor when I studied my MBA, got me my first job in HE 1996 and became my mentor for that first year at Newport and continued to prompt me as we both taught marketing at different institutions. 

Dr. Norah Jones was on my appointment panel in 1998 when I got the Senior Lecturer post at Glamorgan, she then supported me in my interest in quality assurance when she chaired the various quality and exam boards, so that she gave me the skills and knowledge to succeed her as Associate Head of School (Academic) when she moved on to another role at the University. Later, Norah appointed me to be her deputy in the Centre for Excellence in Learning and Teaching and again supported me and formed me so that I was later able to become Head of the Centre and then Director of Learning and Teaching at the University as my career progressed.

Dr. Heather Skinner, seen here sitting opposite me in Wahaca's Cardiff on the last visit to Wales she made before her death was another of those women who influenced me so much. 

Heather was the first staff member, other than the appointment panel, that I met at the University of Glamorgan, though she was called Heather Roberts in those days, before she met Jim Skinner who became her husband. I worked with Heather in the Business School for ten years including lots of teaching trips to places like Hong Kong, Lusaka and Maidenhead! Just writing the place names remind me of the fun we had when on our travels and the students' astounding reaction to two Welsh people with loud voices! In 2005, Heather was there when Drew and I got married, reading AA Milne's Us Two with her usual emotion and enthusiasm that became one of the highlights of our day. 

Later in her career Heather joined our team in the Centre of Learning and Teaching and developed a focus on Graduate Skills for students (called then the Glamorgan Graduate). I was so proud to work closely with Heather when she used her work in Business Education and Graduateness to achieve the first National Teaching Fellow recognition in Wales. 

In 2018, when we last met, Heather knew she had cancer, but spent the next four years reminding me every time we were in touch that she was as ready as she could ever be and like our fellow countryman, Dylan Thomas, Heather was determined never to "go gentle into that good night" but to "Rage, rage against the dying of the light.".

I remember and pray for her with great love and affection. During her latter years in Corfu, Heather's dog Archie built up his own Facebook profile and I would regularly be in touch with her through him. I was extremely touched then when Heather left me a special gift in her will - a painting of Archie I had once commented on on Facebook.

Dr. Kath Ringwald, seen here at home in one of her amazing ensembles that changed daily, died in an accident at home two weeks ago today. 

Fittingly, given her care and attention for other people, Kath had just come from caring for her elderly parents, the last act of a wonderful person being one of offering herself for others.

I met Kath in 1997 when she was in the office next to me in Allt-yr-yn, Newport. She was married to her first husband, John 1, as we came to call him as her second husband was also John. Both of them were of great support to me in my first year in academic life, when their advice guidance and experience was a blessing. The three of us shared love for travel to the USA and Kath's step-daughter lived in Florida, so there was much sharing of photos and laughs when I visited them.

When I left Newport for the University of Glamorgan a year later, we stayed in touch and it was such a joy when almost a decade later Kath made the same move and came to work with us at Treforest. We were both early risers so we would often see each other in the Car Park when we arrived in work and catch-up with her news. It was during this time that Kath showed again her generous nature as she cared for John 1 in his trials with dementia which became trials for her too. But trails which she accepted with the grace and care that characterised her.

During the time after John's death Kath began her study for her doctorate in education, an achievement which she set her heart on with the same enthusiasm she did everything else. Her quiet satisfaction when she became Dr Ringwald was a joy to share with her.

Even at this stage Kath's life was not one of resting on the laurels of her achievement. I remember the day when she told me, that much to her surprise she had met a man with whom she was falling in love. The fact he too was called John was a side-bonus for memory at this new stage in her life.

In the year's since she met John 2, right up to the day she so tragically died, she was filled with a joy which she saw as an unexpected bonus. The pictures on the day of her second wedding and the times they shared together were a great blessing. Kath, though retired, kept on teaching, and only a month or so before her death she rang me to ask how to use MS Teams and MS Office for supporting her part-time tutoring of Masters' students.

One of the joys of faith, for me, is knowing that as I remember and pray for these four friends, living and dead, and all the others I pray for, my prayers are received by the Lord who doesn't care at what stage of life's journey those we pray for are at, but accepts and uses our prayers for their wellbeing and for his greater glory - thanks be to God.